There are times when life sends us more to deal with than we expect, want, or feel we can deal with.  I’ve heard it said that we never get more than what we can handle at any one time.  Sometimes I wonder about that….  How about you?

When life comes crashing in on you from all directions, how do you handle it?  Do you hide your head in the sand, pretending that the difficult issues don’t exist? Do you jump right into all the scenarios and try to put out all the fires in one, big blast?  Do you consult someone, a friend or professional, seeking their advice?  What do you do?

Having felt overwhelmed recently with too many emotional pulls, I’ve had to deal with this problem.  Not easy!  Here are a few ideas on how to ride the emotional waves of overload.  They helped me.  Maybe they’ll help you too.

*Feel the emotions tied to the difficult situation(s) you are experiencing. Feeling releases.  Releasing frees your body of stuck energy that can only cause problems down the road for you it it’s not dealt with.  That is not something you need to create.  Get those feelings out of your body: dance them out, scribble them out, scream them out, paint them out, garden them out, massage them out, move them out of your body in a way that is right for you.  Then fill in the newly, opened space within with the image of something that’s beautiful to you. i.e. a sunset, your favorite flower, a rainbow, whatever it is that makes you smile. Breathe into the newly opened space, filling it on the exhalation.  It may take more than one round, repeat as many times as needed to bring you to a place of balance.

*Breathe.  Breathe deeply, releasing the toxic energy from your body, calming your frazzled nerves.  As you breathe in, you might say a mantra to yourself, I am still. Exhale, I am still. Inhale, I am calm.  Exhale, I am calm.  Inhale, I am peace.  Exhale, I am peace.  (If you prefer, choose just one ‘I am’ statement.)  Breathe the mantra into your body.  Fill it up, every cell.  Exhale, seal the mantra in.  You are creating stillness, calm, and peace within, transforming yourself, which will impact those around you and beyond, like ripples in a pond.

*Go withinto the always peaceful place inside you located in your heart center, the center of your sternum.  Spend some time in this sacred space just being, noticing, feeling peace.  Here is a technique for dropping into your peaceful place:

*Sit forward on your chair with a long spine, legs hip width apart, knees over your ankles, sit forward of your sitz bones on the rami bones (just in front of the sitz bones), with the crown of your head pressing upward.

*Imagine a little elevator that starts at the perineum running parallel to your spine all the way up to the crown (top center) of your head.  

*Picture yourself in the elevator at the bottom floor, the perineum.  Inhale and ride the elevator up to the top floor, the crown of your head, your mind.  

*Next, exhale and ride the elevator down to your heart center at the center of your sternum.  Settle into your heart space, the ever quiet and peaceful space that lives inside you: the place of love, compassion, peace, and your truth. 

*Stay in this still place, allowing yourself to become peace.

*When you feel complete, imagine yourself in the elevator again.  Inhale, then exhale yourself down to the first floor at the perineum.  

*When ready, imagine yourself stepping out of the elevator back into your world balanced, ready to move into your life in a relaxed way. 

NOTE: When you take your first breath up to the top floor (crown of your head), if you don’t sense yourself making it all the way to the top, just inhale wherever you are then take another exhalation upward to the crown of your head.  Do this as many times as needed to get you there.  

Likewise, when you are ready to leave your heart space, after you inhale there, if you don’t drop down into the first floor at the perineum on the first exhalation, just take another breath and exhale down again. Do this as many times as needed until you get there. 

*Accept, accept what you have been dealt.  Whatever you are dealing with is yours to experience even if you don’t like it.  There is something for you to understand, to learn from it, which often comes down the road after some reflection.  I know this seems counterintuitive, especially if what you are experiencing is considered to be negative. Challenging experiences offer you lessons you need to further your spiritual growth.  You have free will to determine how you handle the challenges, which will determine if growth is made.  If your choice doesn’t help you grow in a certain way, you can be sure that you’ll be given future opportunities to do so.  

*Ask for guidance.  Talk to someone you trust.  Pray.  Meditate.  Consult whoever, whatever resonates with you.  In some way, seek assistance, clarity, in determining how best to proceed.  Take in the advice you receive, be with it, then make your decision with intention.  It is important that your decision is your decision, coming from your heart, the place of your truth.  Go within to your heart space and ask if the choice you are considering is in your highest good and that of those involved. Be still. Listen.  Sense.  The true answer is there waiting for you.

Dealing with life’s challenging experiences may be unpleasant and often untimely.  But with intention, effort, and assistance you can handle what the Universe has sent your way and even grow from it.



Sandy Bothmer Copyright 2019

‘Tis the season of gift giving, boxes wrapped in colorful papers with bright bows, and cards or tags attached with the receiver’s name artfully penned.  They are lovely to look at and fun to open.  But there are other kinds of gifts, simple gifts, that don’t come in gaily wrapped boxes that can be given this time of year as well if one’s eyes and ears are open to the possiblity or opportunity ….  Here are some examples I’ve noticed:

people of the world

“We’re all one family under one sky. We’re a family under one sky. No matter what differences we have….” Those are words from a song that my grandson’s, diverse kindergarten class performed recently.  How true those words are.  We are all human beings, one family, with differences, living under one sky on our precious Mother Earth, but so often, our actions don’t always reflect kind, caring, respectful family relations.

Two people walking together.

Life isn’t always a ‘bowl full of cherries’.  Things don’t go the way you’d like them to go, or you find yourself in a messy situation and wish you hadn’t acted or said what you said.  You might even realize this as it’s happening, but it’s too late.  What was said was said.  What was done was done.  With life’s, messy situations that you find yourself in, come any number of negative emotions: sadness, frustration, anger, depression, guilt, fear, etc.  What can you do the next time you find yourself in an unpleasant, messy, life situation?

While driving to my daughter’s in Providence, RI one day, I was listening to Terry Gross on NPR’s Fresh Air.  She was interviewing Jonathan Safran Foer about his book, Here I am.She asked him what the title, taken from the Bible (Genesis 22:1), meant to him. In the course of the discussion, the meaning was equated to: “Live your life.” (attributed to Maurice Sendak.), which to Jonathan meant to seize the day.  Live life to the fullest.  Be present to it.  Terry’s interpretation was, “Inhabit your life.”  Inhabit your life;  What did she mean?  I’ve been pondering that….

Recently, I was thumbing through a Yoga Journal magazine and came across an ad titled “Peace is the new power.”  Since the word ‘peace’ is my word for 2017, I naturally stopped to take in those words.  “Peace is the new power.”  I truly believe that peace is power; that the power of peace is transformative and what is needed today more than ever. 

Just before the new year, I was with a friend who asked me, ”What’s your word for the new year?”  She wanted to know what word would be my torch, my guiding light, my intention for the new year.  She had hers, letting go. I didn’t have an answer for her at that moment.  I needed to give it some thought.


It’s been much too long since I’ve written a new blog post, but there just didn’t seem to be anything special that I wanted to say.  At this time, the tide has turned, for I now have something that is important to me, important to share with as many as I can.   It’s about peace, peace within and peace in the world. . . .